on the verge of green and yellow...

what im asking for is a complete change for everybody. i just wanted everyone to be good and to please their teacher and be good little first year students.

everyone has done their part, all of us teachers. remind, lecture and be a guide to everyone on how to do their part as students, good students.

but in the end, what they want is still what they do. they say that they will follow and yet they do what they want.

so this is all i want to say...

gawin nyo pa rin ng gawin ang gusto nyo. sige, sinabi ko sumunod sa akin eh. kung ayaw nyo, eh di ok. madali naman ako kausap. alam nyo naman na kung saan kayo masaya, yun ang ibibigay ko sa inyo di ba? sinabi ko rin na ayaw kong mamilit, ang mga ayaw wag pilitin. so sige, wag pa kayong sumunod.

~ ~ ~

parang magagamit ko ulit yellow shirts ko this year.

<:-P

~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo, my agrianes batch?

i found the song i was looking for, Lilliane. :]

hajimete kimi to shabetta  kimi wa waratte kureta
hajimete kimi to shabereta  boku no kono kotoba de
       I talked to you for the first time, you smiled at me
             I was able to talk to you for the first time, with these words


boku nanka ga shaberi kaketara meiwaku ni omou ka na
sonna fuan o kakaete  yuuki o dashite mita yo
umaku shaberenai boku no fukiyou na hanashi
kimi wa mimi o sorasazu ni chanto kiite kureta yo
       If i spoke to you, you'd think im a nuisance
             Holding on to that uncertainty, i summoned my courage
             Im not good at talking and my words are clumsy
             But you gave your full attention and listened to me 

sore dake de boku wa mai agatteru no sa
fushigi na chikara ga karada o tsutsunderu kanji  ima dake sa
       Just like that, im up in the clouds
             But you dont think very much of me do you?

dakedo
       but

*hajimete kimi to shabetta  kimi wa waratte kureta
hajimete kimi to shabereta  boku no kono kotoba de
hajimete kimi to shabetta  kimi wa waratte kureta
hajimete kimi to shabereta  boku no kono kotoba de*
       *I talked to you for the first time, you smiled at me
              I was able to talk to you for the first time, with these words
              I talked to you for the first time, you smiled at me
              I was able to talk to you for the first time, with these words

kotoba wa itsudemo boku o kurushimete bakari
dakedo sukutte kureru no mo itsumo kotoba datta yo
dareka ni warawareta-tte kanawanai no sa
kimi to shabereta jijitsu ga boku ni wa tsuiteru kara
        Words give me trouble all the time
              But it's also always words that save me
              I don't care if someone laughs at me
              I have the fact that I was able to talk to you

sore dake de boku wa ukarete shimau no sa
dakedo kimi wa boku nante nantomo omottenai yo ne  setsunai yo
              I'm in a great mood, just because of that
              But you don't think of me in any way, that hurts

dakedo
        but

repeat *

~ ~ ~

song from naruto ending 8: hajimete kimi to shabetta

~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo?

unknown soldier

by breaking benjamin

Unknown Soldier - Breaking Benjamin Music Code


Borderline, dead inside,
I don't mind, falling to pieces
Count me in, violin, let's begin,
feeding the sickness
How do I, simplify, dislocate,
the enemies on the way

Show me what it's like,
to dream in black and white,
so I can leave this world tonight.

Full of fear, ever clear,
I'll be here, fighting forever
Curious, venomous, you'll find me,
climbing to heaven
Nevermind, turn back time, you'll be fine,
I will get left behind

Show me what it's like,
to dream in black and white,
so I can leave this world tonight.
Holding on too tight,
breathe the breath of life,
so I can leave this world behind.

It only hurts just once,
they're only broken bones,
hide the hate inside

(So I can leave this world behind)

Show me what it's like,
to dream in black and white,
so I can leave this world tonight.
Holding on too tight,
breathe the breath of life,
so I can leave this world behind


~ ~ ~

for all those who "left me behind..."


and took me for granted.


youre missing half of your lives. gg

~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo?

an end to a happy week (plus quotes for kyla. LOLZ)

this past week has been a blast. from monday to friday, it was something different. it was the first academic that i spent having the most fun days. looking forward to the next day, looking forward to the next topics to talk about.

most of the time it was fun, and then there were those awkward moments and then there were those laughter moments. this week was so balanced in all emotions that it is so perfect. when i look back at the happenings of this week, i really wish that i could go back and watch all of the things that happened.

basta, bottom line i was happy because i was able to talk to a lot of people, especially those that i really missed (kasi nagalit ako sa kanila for a looong time...)

and at the the very last hours of the weekdays, i found out something new and different about a person. a person that i thought was selfish, and self-centered was really a caring and selfless person who thinks and concerned a lot about others' feelings and how they are in their social life.

this week is so perfect. i love it.


~ ~ ~

quotes!!

You broke my heart. Now I'm gonna break something of yours!
- patrick star from spongebob squarepants, valentines day episode

That's why its called crush. Your heart gets CRUSHED in the end.

- mandy from the grim adventures of billy and mandy, happy huggy stuffy bears episode

You know he's not going to love you back...why are you falling for him?
- Nova from Magic Knight Rayearth episode 41


~ ~ ~

shoo, ex-students!

~ ~ ~

YOU are being ignored!!

~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo?

helping

it is 4:20 pm in the afternoon and i feel very depressed.

"ang hirap kunin ng kiliti ng boys ng camiguin. kakaiba sila kasi sa batch nila a**** at sa batch nila c******* boys muna yung una kong nakakausap bago yung girls." i once told a friend.

and it seems i was right. well except for 4 or 5 of them. but for the rest, i guess we dont really click.

~ ~ ~

they say that we need our friends to help us in our time of need. they also say that true friends help each other in good times and in bad.

events recently made me realize that there is such a thing as helping and over-helping a.k.a. meddling. i think the depression that im feeling now is my own fault for being too "pakialamero." and events led me to see that there are people who are hard to reach out to.

i tried helping. i even sacrificed my friendship (by telling a lie) to see if something will happen. but i guess there was no "friendship" that was sacrificed. it was a one-way friendship, from me to that person. in the cyberworld, there was a different person - trusting, nice to talk to - but in the real world - nothing.


"kwentuhan mo naman ako, ano ba nangyari?"
"..."
"bakit hindi ka nagsasalita, nahihiya ka ba sa akin? bakit pag sa ym, di ka ganyan? hindi ako teacher dito ngayon. kaibigan mo ko. kausapin mo naman ako."
"..."
"alam mo bang di ako makatulog nung sinabi mo na galit ka. kasi nalungkot ako..."
"..."
"ganito na lang, gusto mo bang magkwento sa akin o ayaw? at wag mong takpan bibig mo..."
"*shakes head*"

it hurts me SO MUCH when people show two-different faces at me. they act like they like me at one point and otherwise in another. but experiences from the past told me that i should not let those "two-faced people" should not make me hate the whole of the group that he or she belongs to. i have still my girls with me (and some of the boys). and i gues that makes my time worth spending with my one of my most favorite groups in school.

Lilliane, im SOO sorry. read my friendster comment. i am so so sooo sorry. im not fair to you. maiintindihan mo rin ako balang araw alam ko. and i wont be surprised kung magagalit ka sa akin dahil hindi ako fair.

~ ~ ~

1. double-clicked yahoo messenger icon
2. clicked ***_***_** > press delete
3. went to messenger > preferences
4. highlighted "ignore list" then clicked "add"
5. put in ***_***_** then clicked "ignore" button
6. clicked "apply" then "ok" button


you have been ignored. nagpaalam na ako sayo.

~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo!

~ ~ ~

a happy day in the agrianes shirt

never thought i would have a happy and full-of-laughter day wearing my agrianes shirt.

today was officially day one of academic week, and we had the dasayawit contest for the first years today. i was amused at what they performed. it did not really anger me to see poor performances because i was kind of expecting it. and in a way i was really wishing for them to flunk at it to make them see that they cannot do it alone. that they cannot do a performance in the level of high school in what they know now. that they need me, they need the teachers to help them in their next big performance. cheering. sana lang ma-realize nila. *crosses-fingers* (although some teachers have already given up on them, but im prepared to fight a lonely fight for them :*> )

after the dasayawit, i felt hunger thats why i grabbed something to eat for lunch and then i proceeded to the auditorium to watch the math quiz bee. the quiz bee was very amusing. i had lots of laughs. especially the question:

"what is 20% of 10?" - only one team (out of five) got it right. hilarious.

most especially, i LOOOOOVE the intermission number. the highlight of my happiness and laughter was seeing that part. *ROFL* it's not the dance steps that is funny, its the no-dancing that's funny! i was even talking to this person in ym the previous day that he was very serious in dancing and learning the steps and then "that" happened. sooo powerful.

the quiz bee ended at around 3, and i have a class at camiguin from 3 to 4 during regular classes. so i went to their classroom hoping to chat with them. im having a difficult time finding a moment to talk with them because most of the time they are with their adviser, and i wouldnt want to steal that time with them which is more important.

anyway, when i got in i teased the "dancer" (LOLZ) but i think he was in a bad mood (or he was just being himself that time). so i did not mind him that much. but i got to talk with two of my most favorite persons in camiguin. and it was soooooo fun. because i learned a lot. (we'll get to the learning part later) it was so fun.

and then sir pj came in and talked with my favorite persons, then i saw "her." i approached her because in a way i feel sad for her. i know what it feels like to open a conversation and you get ignored. and when we are talking, people started gathering around me and the fun started.

~ ~ ~

what made me happy today:

- i verified who jacob is
- i knew who mr. x is
- i knew there were many who likes "dwarf"
- i knew there were many who likes jacob as well [how can you like someone with that hair?!]
- i knew that one who likes "dwaf" before likes jacob now
- i knew that one who likes "dwarf" now as likes back
- i knew that seatmate does not really hate seatmate but likes instead
- i knew that seatmate is badtrip at seatmate but seatmate does not really hate seatmate
- i knew that many people likes jacob
- i knew that annie batungbacal likes one of my sons [ >:) ]
- i knew that there are 3-month old lovers within, i thought it was joke ~_~
- i knew that one who likes "dwarf" has someone named "sweaty palms" @_@
- i knew that k likes a [hahaha ang obvious]
- i knew that annie batungbacal likes the super thin guy, my partner in crime. [LOLZ again]
- i knew that pseudo-emo guy likes darkness. haha. [ :X ]

and the most fun thing that i loved knowing today was that...

- cassy likes terrence. a lot. (oh yeah, cassy likes "dwarf" before too as well. ~_~)


im like so kilig at terrence and cassy right now.

~ ~ ~

high school love is sooooooooo fun. i miss high school days.

sana maulit, camiguin.

never thought i would have such fun today in this agrianes shirt. the shirtthat brought me lonelines at one point in my life.
~ ~ ~

sweaty palms is uber flattered with what he knew today. *hug*

~ ~ ~

shoo, ex-students

~ ~ ~

(isshouni asobo) let's play, camiguin!

farewell, my "ex-students"

recent events (which few might know of) led me of being reminded that as a teacher, i am given a responsibility of being a second parent. but i was also TOLD that i have my limits too. such limits are that when the students that i have are no longer "mine" or i dont handle them anymore, again i have limitations with my relationship with the "ex-students."

i have been told (emphasis on the "told" ) that i should not anymore busy myself with my "ex-students." anything that would happen to them with regards to their attitude, self-discipline and becoming good persons should be left to their immediate teachers. i think this means that our relationship should be a shallow student-teacher type.

so to all my "ex-students":

talking with you has been fun. i thank you for the secrets shared, for the laughter moments and for the bonding time. i hope that you remember all that i have told you. even if we will still be seeing each other at school, greeting each other is the only thing that we can do spontaneously (well, aside from my club members). so again, i thank you. having you as my "ex-first year students" was a blast (yes, even the agrianes batch).

well, it has come to this. no regrets, as they say. besides, it was the "ex-student/s" who caused this to happen.


so please, im asking / begging my ex-students - no talk, no ym chat.

goodbye and goodluck.


~ ~ ~

... got a phony smile that makes you think he understands,
But no one ever gets the truth from plastic man.


~ ~ ~


first year is love! <3

let's cherish our moments with each other. 4 months left for us to bond. and after that, we'll part ways.



~ ~ ~

isshouni asobo, freshmen?